Humor
COVID-19
How the highway to hell has changed for COVID
Even though I’m in Hell this semester, and not lurking in the tunnels, don’t despair! I’ll be holding Zoom sessions for you to get taken care of. Read More
grave robbing
Help! I can’t get rid of my quarantine body
People keep telling me to “get rid of my quarantine body,” and there’s only one explanation: I’ve been found out. Read More
lasers
Supreme to sponsor new Optics Laser
The Supreme x UR Optics collab, the Yellowjacket-Machina Laser, drops Dec.r 21. According to University President Sarah Mangelsdorf, this has been in the works for some time now as an initiative to get more students to study optical engineering. The Yellowjacket-Machina laser features a classy gold lining on the outside, with a titanium-garnet crystal core […]
dorm room
Disappointment at disappearance of dorm room galleries
“I’ve been having people over at the house. I know we’re not supposed to, but I think the rule breaking just contributes to the artistry of my decor." Read More
cooking
Freshman Cooking Basics: Ramen
If you’re not willing to compromise in the carcinogen category, I’d opt for Maggi noodles, which contain 25% more lead and MSG than Maruchan ramen noodles. Read More
COVID-19
How a transnasal lobotomy made me reevaluate my life
What was supposed to be a brief nasal swab scrambled my brain like an ostrich egg. I immediately blacked out for 18 hours. I think. Read More
COVID-19
I have taken the Flag Lounge into my own hands
There were 163 flags hanging in the lounge, each one three by five feet. That’s a lot to just "hide." Where are they now? Read More
COVID-19
Varsity football to become scooter club due to pandemic
Maybe a cavalry charge would be a good analogy? Either way, they’re zooming around campus on scooters and having a blast doing it. Read More
COVID-19
Study shows food provides protection from COVID-19
“Because social distancing is required at all times, and I can’t have any visitors, the news that food prevents coronavirus spread has completely saved my social life,” Read More
COVID-19
Rocky X Future collab: Wear A Mask
Take a listen to this sick track from rapper Future and UR icon Rocky, as they remind you of the best way to combat COVID-19. Read More