UR Joking
ASMR
ASMR ruined my life, kidnapped my cat, and broke my headphones
There was something about a total stranger greeting me with a whispered “Hi, friend :)” and then pretending to touch my face that freaked me out. Read More
beaver
Beavers: so vogue
With the lovable face of a muskrat paired with that irresistible tail of a platypus, what is not to love? Don’t even get me started on those phenomenal incisors. Read More
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advice
Discouragement, motivation, and other unhelpful tips
Once you make it to hysterical laughter over the thought of the amount of work you have left to do, you’ve reached peak college nihilism. Join the club. I’m so proud of you! /s. Read More
Professors
Disgruntled professors launch “Rate My Students”
The courageous can head over to RateMyStudents.com for a conclusive answer to a different question: Just how much do your professors hate your guts? Read More
tiktok
Rekindling my religious fire with the Miami Boys Choir
One commenter on the original MBC video referred to the genre of music as “K-Pop (kosher pop),” and I haven’t stopped laughing at the randomness of this phenomenon in public whenever I think about it a little too hard. Read More
UR Joking
A guide to first-year attachment styles
The math isn’t mathing, and that’s good because it’s going to confuse the anxious-ambivalents, which was our goal all along. Read More
Secret mission
TOP SECRET: My life as an undercover freshman
Even after hours of simpering chatter over empty fry boats, I still have no goddamn clue why they flock to the Pit like fledgling geese scrambling to shit on my lawn. Read More
chemistry
Feel the Chemistry
There is no outside world: Existence is a prison, and carbon is my enemy. The fuck is a valence? Electric-type Pokémon did not prepare me for this shit. Read More
Stairs
A brief guide to the trials and tribulations regarding the steps of Rochester
This University, conveniently, has no consistency in their stair design: the first-year quad has some beefy steps and Wilco has tiny little bitch stairs. Read More
