Archives - Bryan Burke

Birding club takes flight

Birding Club has realized what the vast majority of onlookers have known for quite some time: These birds are fucking lame.

Coffee! The all natural pick-me-up!

Due tomorrow does in fact mean do tomorrow.

Slippery slope: more than just a fallacy

Despite ice being obviously not snow, members of the skiing club simply did not care, calling it close enough.

To eat, or not to eat, that is the question

Professors of the chemical engineering department are now offering a fun little opportunity for all UR students looking to complete their History cluster. For no less than 40 hours a week, you have the privilege of LARPing as a feudal serf.


They moved in packs, resembling clouds of yellow pain. Their intent: to drive students into buildings, away from campus center, and just generally insane.

It’s 11p.m. somehow?

Flintstones gummies and caffeine shall be my only saviors during the darker days of this semester.

The Gourds of Wrath

You frighten me, Mr. Pumpkin. Your violent delights can only meet violent ends.

Teach a Man to Physics, He’ll Eat the Exam

It may have been the stress of the impending examination, because my tummy was quite aggravated by my inability to find some nutrients in a timely manner, but I suddenly felt sick.

Beavers: so vogue

With the lovable face of a muskrat paired with that irresistible tail of a platypus, what is not to love? Don’t even get me started on those phenomenal incisors. 
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A brief guide to the trials and tribulations regarding the steps of Rochester

This University, conveniently, has no consistency in their stair design: the first-year quad has some beefy steps and Wilco has tiny little bitch stairs.