Humor

CT Recommends: Headbutting

People often don’t know how to respond to an unexpected headbutt, but such strange behavior is objectively amusing to some. Read More

Argument breaks out in first-year quad over who is the most pre-med pre-med

In a particularly heated moment, onlookers reported that it appeared one student tried to papercut another using her laminated CV.  Read More

CT Life Skills: How to eat food

Some criteria to keep in mind: Is the thing you want to eat moving? If so, it may be alive or a car, and therefore very difficult to catch and eat. Read More

Engineering expo promises “New opportunities for misery and death in the Middle East”

“We hope students will take this opportunity to get in on the ground floor of unmitigated slaughter,” a UR Career Center representative told the CT. Read More

Letter to the Editor: In Defense of Coronas

Why does everyone keep talking about Coronas coming from China? It’s definitely a Mexican beer. My Mom says I go to a New Ivy and am very intelligent. Read More

Ken Jennings crowned king of ‘Jeopardy!,’ becomes vaguely famous

Jennings defeated longtime rival Brad Rutter and newcomer James Holzhauer, and is now even occasionally recognized when walking down the street.  Read More

The Official Campus Times Alternative Oscars

In the interest of helping the Academy understand what it missed, CT has assembled a worthy alternative. Presenting... the first nominees for the Wilfords! Read More

UR students report actual work was assigned on syllabus week

The beginning of the new semester is a time cherished by all. But students have come face-to-face with a terrifying new development: actual assignments. Read More

Demon Girl: Arizona isn’t Hell, but it’s almost as hot

Shoutout to the three Customs and Border Protection agents whose souls we ate. Sometimes you just need a little junk food. Read More

The official CT holiday traveler’s guide to insufferable passengers

Every airport and train station will be filled with thousands of people all overflowing with romantic ideals of travel. Those people are insufferable. Read More