Narratives

Broken records

With his alarm blasting, head ringing, and heart sinking, senior Erik Franclin dragged himself out of bed. Read More

The importance of flossing

You see, I have nice teeth. Like, REALLY nice teeth. Read More

The CrossFit cult

The summer before I entered eighth grade, my dad made the executive decision to immerse our family in a cult. Read More

Examples of how I don’t know what I’m doing

Can I please be a dancing, Hebrew-speaking, brain-researching, religious-sex-expert please? Anyone hiring? Read More

Slogan debunker

Hello, again! My name is Pete, and somehow I’m still the CT’s Senior Slogan Debunker. I’ve been tasked with assessing the logic behind some popular slogans, so let’s see how they hold up. Read More

Toddler detective, chapter 7

I’m suddenly very aware of my legs not being able to touch the ground from the hybrid highchair/barstool here at the Dirty Diaper. Read More

I have a problem

I'm a firm believer that life boils down to a few simple things. Character, charisma, intelligence, and personality all come to mind. Read More

The end of the world as we know it

Can someone explain to me what in God’s name Macaroni and Cheese Soup is? Read More

An open letter that should be closed

Wow. I’ve never written an open letter before, but now I feel really good about myself. Read More

Toddler detective, chapter 6

I tried to kick in the door like an old Western movie, but I ended up just kicking through the door and getting stuck for, like, ten minutes. Read More