Humor

Her Name Was Rosemary! She Was an “It”-Girl!

What have we gained from this? I ask this genuinely, because I do not know. If we are Sisyphus, Party School is our rock.

Rest in peace, Med Center bat

Finding a bat in a med center lab raises a lot of questions: How did it get in here? Why did it pick a sticky trap as its landing pad?

The mice make me crazy

Wait! There is still hope! We are not animals. We have technology! Google says mouse traps. I say let the arms race begin.

No more Mel Sauce weekend

My tuition is paying for barrels upon barrels of Mel Sauce for this weekend alone. Do we really need a Mel Sauce slip and slide?

Her name was Rosemary! She was an “It”-Girl!

Mills’ relationship with Rosemary feels actively teenage and real, which makes the humor that follows it fall flatter.

Go To Sleep, UR!

“Hat Man appeared within the intersection of reality and imagination, in the world between sleepiness and wakefulness.” 

Elena’s Haircut

I must’ve blacked out while they were washing my hair, but Alicia tells me that I told her I wanted a “cute lil’ gay lil’ thing”

Knowledge is power

I ain't fucking around on my phone for multiple hours while the existential dread of never being good enough creeps in.

‘Fish pledge’: the WCSA story

More troubling, she is one of the newer staff members: could this be a form of hazing? “If he dies, that’s on me,” she confides.

Libraries out of calculators, students turn to the dark arts

In replacement of the calculators, the libraries have begun to hand out abacuses to students, and offering lessons on how to use them.