UR Joking
academic tomfoolery
The Structure of an Essay
Finally, you have the conclusion, the only part of your essay that your professor will actually read. You can’t exactly blame them.
Gilbert
The PumpKing
Ready to take the pumpkin out on a walk, we looked for it within our lounge. But it wasn’t there. Had someone taken it?
airport shenanigans
Elena’s LEGOs
I’m scrambling. How had this all gone so wrong so quickly? Luckily, I had Markup. I was good, maybe too good. He gobbled my lies right up.
Barry Manilow
Her Name Was Rosemary! She Was an “It”-Girl!
What have we gained from this? I ask this genuinely, because I do not know. If we are Sisyphus, Party School is our rock.
Animals
Rest in peace, Med Center bat
Finding a bat in a med center lab raises a lot of questions: How did it get in here? Why did it pick a sticky trap as its landing pad?
arms race
The mice make me crazy
Wait! There is still hope! We are not animals. We have technology! Google says mouse traps. I say let the arms race begin.
finance
No more Mel Sauce weekend
My tuition is paying for barrels upon barrels of Mel Sauce for this weekend alone. Do we really need a Mel Sauce slip and slide?
Barry Manilow
Her name was Rosemary! She was an “It”-Girl!
Mills’ relationship with Rosemary feels actively teenage and real, which makes the humor that follows it fall flatter.
Gleason
Go To Sleep, UR!
“Hat Man appeared within the intersection of reality and imagination, in the world between sleepiness and wakefulness.”
bleach
Elena’s Haircut
I must’ve blacked out while they were washing my hair, but Alicia tells me that I told her I wanted a “cute lil’ gay lil’ thing”
