The white “Hall Pumpkin” of the first floor Gilbert lounge. No one knows where it came from. It simply appeared one day in the lounge. 

The Hall Pumpkin first appeared two weeks before Halloween. At a time no one was expecting it, it showed itself to us, and we became infatuated with it. Perhaps it was the way that it glistened in the sunlight, or perhaps it was the seductive way that it was shaped, but we worshiped it. 

We watered it every day, and sometimes took it outside with us to our classes. We took it to dinner, and we adorned it with jewels. We gave it everything that we thought it needed to grow larger.

For days, nothing changed. It was still the same pumpkin that we had grown to love. 

However, as Halloween day approached, something about it seemed different. 

We didn’t notice it at first, but upon closer inspection, it was larger than before. We realized that the pumpkin was growing. Our worship had given it power, and we wanted to make it more powerful.

We watered it more and more, and we gave it more sunlight, all for the sake of making it larger, and filling it with more power. 

Then, Halloween day finally arrived. Our pumpkin, larger than ever, was ready to be seen. 

Ready to take the pumpkin out on a walk, we looked for it within our lounge. But it wasn’t there. Had someone taken it? No. No one would dare. 

It must have grown powerful enough to develop legs and walk away. Or, perhaps it grew wings and flew away. We don’t know where it went, but we know that it would’ve had to run away by itself. 

Thanks to our guidance and nurturing, it must’ve gained sentience and run in search of a life of its own. One day, when it is ready, it will appear again before us as the king of the pumpkins. The PumpKing.



Four students arrested in conjunction with ‘wanted’ posters

The Department of Public Safety (DPS) announced the arrests of four individuals allegedly involved in the recent distribution of ‘wanted’ posters.

Controversy ensues after “DWTS” Week 6

I was truly at an impasse and distraught: I didn’t want anyone to go home. But someone must. 

Is burnout inescapable?

Anyone who’s ever been a student knows that burnout rears its ugly head around the same time every semester, and yet, it’s never easy to prepare for.