Humor
Humor
Student chooses to not pursue internship, thinks it’ll work out
This past weekend, junior Charles Wilkens announced to his parents: “Mom, Dad, I don’t want an internship this summer.” Read More
Humor
Cats “R” Us: Insights into the lives of cats
This past Thursday, Friday and Saturday, evolutionary biologists at UR observed a concerning trend: the ecosystem balance between squirrels, skunks, groundhogs and cats seemed to be very out of place. Seemingly out of nowhere, cats—an animal not typically seen around campus—were spotted at a ridiculously high rate. When asked about the issue, department members commented, […]
Humor
A tourist’s guide to Washington D.C.
I’ve been in Washington D.C., the political capital of the world, for a couple of months now participating in an internship through the University. With this in mind, I’ve seen every famous tourist site, and have gained valuable insight from each visit. This article contains none of that insight. Nevertheless, here is a brief detailing […]
Humor
You are what you eat
Last week, UR Dining Services announced that Danforth will start serving only organically-sourced food, after several students protested animal cruelty by after a deer entered in Strong Memorial Hospital. While some health and environmentally-conscious students appreciated the gesture, many demanded even more meaningful change. “It’s a step in the right direction,” freshman Rachele Pianto said, […]
Humor
The Adversary prepared to end Campus Times
The Adversary Rochester, The Adversary UR or simply just “The Adversary” (I have no idea—someone please help me out here) launched online in October 2015 with the mission of making all self-described “edgy” UR Students’ voices heard. Here at Campus Times, we are losing our damn minds. The Adversary debuted with a 66-second YouTube video, […]
Humor
Diving deep into the bowels of the bathroom with UR’s Toilet MacGyver
Riverview: a place where you are living off campus, but can still enjoy the convienience of a declining plan. Another great amenity that I should mention is the bathroom. I would say that I spend more time in the bathroom than I do in my bedroom. Sure, it’s nice having a bed to sleep in, […]
Humor
Halloween costume power rankings
Now that another season of the beloved Hallows Eve has passed, it’s time to look back on the best and the worst of this year’s costumes. After all, the only thing sweeter than dressing up to release your inner witch, vampire, slutty kitten or guy-trying-to-get-away-with-not-wearing-a-costume is knowing that you’re beating everyone else in the grand […]
Humor
nited States government thinks forward, chooses not to shut down
WASHINGTON, D.C.—In breaking news this week, the government made a landmark decision to not shut down. Political spectators across the country simultaneously unclenched as they were once again relieved to hear that the inherent stubbornness and selfishness of elected officials still does not extend beyond the loss of their paychecks. However, don’t be fooled into […]
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Marxist scholars uncover long-forgotten ‘Rom-Communist Manifesto’
Karl Marx is generally known for the economic theories he promulgated, which led to authoritarian regimes around the world, and to the Cold War. But, recent British scholarship has shown that the bearded revolutionary had a lighter side as well. Specifically, excavation at the British Museum Reading Room has uncovered a manuscript which modern scholarship […]
Humor
How to score a 4.0
What would you do for a 4.0? At the University of Rochester, we pride ourselves on answering that question with immediacy and almost disturbing bluntness. “What wouldn’t I do? Whatever I have to do. I’m serious, nothing is beneath me.” These grades serve as our validation and livelihood. They are why so many of us […]