Humor
Greek Life
Jungle Party Recap
Sigma Chi had its big ol’ juicy Jungle Party this weekend, and boy, did I go. Read More
Humor
Reflection Among the Revelry
I asked the graduating seniors what they regret, feeling it was important to hear about the experiences of the seniors. Either they didn’t expect such a serious question, or they needed more time to process words through the drunken stupor of the Senior Week Wine Tour. Read More
Trump
Niche sports neglected in Trump’s tweets
The Ohio Machine are outraged at their lack of opportunities for outrage. Read More
Dora the Explorer
Dora and the Lost Ark
Little Suzie Jenkins is a true Dora aficionado, and she knew from the beginning that this Dora episode was going to be something special. Read More
Narratives
A Meal for You and Megan
A cheating boyfriend learns why the new restaurant's name is pronounced "MEE-gan." Read More
UR Joking
Yellowjacket Nests Banned as Decorations
The administration-backed initiative to ban the nests finally passed last week, despite stiff opposition from students. Read More
UR Joking
Pawlicki hopes to regain ‘Most Reviled’ title
“Last week I was still considered the most repugnant person on campus. Now? I can’t even get sneered at in the hallway.” Read More
Satire
The difficulties of living in Genesee Hall
You would think Genesee Hall to be perfect, but it actually has more problems than any of the others. Even the freshman quad. Read More
Humor
Night King repairs weather machine
“It seemed perfect,” Seligman said. “This guy has winter trademarked, so if anyone could fix Rochester’s weather, it’s the Night King." Read More
Nicolas Cage
Picolas Cage and the Chamber of Secrets
Faced with the real Nicolas Cage trapped in a life-sized pickle, I asked the cinematic legend what I could do to help. Read More
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