Humor
chandeliers
New study finds majority of Eastman students are three chandeliers piled inside a trench coat
Professors are admitting that, in hindsight, the study’s findings should have been obvious from the start. Read More
Football
Yellowjackets blow out Patriots in Super Bowl surprise
UR Football’s 76–3 victory over the New England Patriots at Super Bowl LIII last Sunday left everyone reeling from the improbable result. Read More
jaeger
Jaeger uses Fortnite skin to relate to students
Despite purchasing the "Jaeger Primal Hunter" outfit, the professor has yet to rank in the top 75 of a 100-person game. Read More
UR Joking
Choose your own blizzard/nor’easter/geostorm
Use a SAD Lamp? Attend a wedding? Wear an obscenely expensive coat? Devour a classmate? In this Choose Your Own Adventure Game, it's all up to you! Read More
Midterms
Student unaware exam mistakes are changing laws of the universe
The first-year’s eldritch ignorance first came to attention when a faulty use of the buoyancy equation sunk every vessel in the South China Sea. Read More
Political Comedy
University shutdown continues
Debate over funding for the proposed campus border wall prolongs the ongoing University shutdown. Read More
study
Look on the Bright Side…
Luis visits Mariama in Valentine Tower one afternoon looking for motivation to study. He finds it, but in an unexpected way. Read More
Christmas
Michael Bublé Emerges From Year-Long Hibernation In Egg To Judge Mankind
The 43-year old Canadian crooner was seen last Sunday dividing up a crowd of Vancouver Starbucks patrons by their moral purity. Read More
vote
Florida Experiences Problems with Recurring Recounts
Florida, a state that is "physically incapable of making decisions" is under fire as midterm elections went to yet another recount. Read More
Dining
Gone Bananas
Smuggling fruit out of the dining halls is an almost universal practice among UR students. How many is too many? The morality of one student's 23 banana conquest is called into question. Read More
