Humor
DPS
Dorm door struck by 57 bullets after refusing PubSafe’s orders to open
During a routine lock-out call in O’Brien Hall Thursday night, 59 bullets were discharged into a door from the barrel of a Department of Public Safety officer-involved gun. Read More
Rocky
Rocky to be replaced by URBee after losing legal battle against Georgia Tech’s Buzz
Up until recently, Georgia Tech had an agreement with UR that allowed the two yellowjackets to coexist peacefully. Read More
April Fools
Coachella 2024 moving to Rochester
While the original lineup will be preserved (barring Doja Cat, who refuses to travel to upstate New York), the Rochester-based band Fuzzrod will be added. Read More
April Fools
Not sexist enough: Computer Science professor fired
Walter Mellon, tenured professor of Computer Science, was quietly relieved of his duties earlier this week due to his “unwavering refusal to adhere to outdated gender stereotypes,” Computer Science Department Chair Michael L. Scott announced. Read More
April Fools
Protest policy changes: A rundown
The status of UR’s Protest Policy is constantly in flux so here’s a rundown to help you keep track of it all. Read More
April Fools
Album Review
I listened to an Album by an Artist and it was okay, I guess. When I pressed play, it made noises and I heard it. That was fine. Read More
April Fools
Comedy declared dead by federal regulators
Fun time’s over, according to Federal Commissioner of Comedy Sean O’Comedy, who has officially declared that comedy is dead. Read More
April Fools
AG Letitia James Seizes Rush Rhees Library as Part of Trump’s Asset Forfeiture
The building notably does not bear any Trump branding, unlike his other properties but considered "an indispensable part" of his real estate portfolio. Read More
bees
Not a drill: UR’s administration is trying to control us with mechanical bees.
“Hello, student. I am NOT a mechanical bee. Would you like a lollipop?” The student then follows the voice, and the bee flies into his ear. Read More
anti-stalking
How to anti-stalk someone in 10 steps
Expect the unexpected. Who would be in the stacks on a Friday evening? WRONG. This mentality is shortsighted. Read More
