Archives - CT Staff

Due to an inaccurate title for professor of Russian and Director of the Russian Studies Program Kathleen Parth printed in the Campus Campus Revolution months ago, the Russian studies program has been terminated.The title of the article was also changed to fit the space, further reducing any interest students might have in the department."It's all […]

By abbaClassic EntertainersIn response to increased incidents of crime on campus as well as a March 13 letter to the Campus Campus Revolution, President and CEO of UR, Inc. Thomas "Jacko" Jackson and UR Security Chieftain Wally Mauldin are coordinating the destruction of the footbridge, which links River Campus to the 19th Ward."Them city people […]

By Gloria GaynorDisco-Happy DivaIn a surprise move Monday night, Comrades of SA President and senior Lonny Mallach led students in attack formation into the Gowan Room and took over the senate by force, citing that the senate needed a 'regime change.'"It was time to get rid of Ashley Conner," Mallach said. "She is a weapon […]

The Campus Campus Revolution supports the use of force in implementing a regime change in the Students' Association Senate.Comrade Lonny Mallach should be commended for his initiative in taking care of a problem that has plagued UR students for decades. The tyrannies of the senate have been perpetuated for too long.When considering whether regime change […]

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By GooseMy WingmanAt this morning's press conference senior Allen Fitzsimmons made an announcement that shocked the UR community. It's official - Fitzsimmons will return to UR next year, but instead of being on the squash courts he'll return to captain the Dance Dance Revolution team in their second season."I was doubtful for a while, but […]

BY TONY MANEROStayin' AliveUniversity President Thomas "Michael" Jackson announced yesterday that work would begin on building a giant plexiglass dome over the River Campus as part of the Renaissance Plan.The announcement came during a special closed-door executive session held last week, sources close to Jackson say. "I've [been] tired - of [UR] students [complaining]," Jackson […]

Oh boy. Last night was fun. Yes my friends, I finally bought a dime bag and enjoyed a nice puff of the weed.Cannabis, pot, weed, joint, whatever - it's all good stuff. I didn't know what I was missing.It felt great. I had no freaking clue what was going on. The walls whizzed by in […]

FORGET TOM "JACKO" JACKSON'S SO-CALLED "RENAISSANCE PLAN." THE AGE OF THE GREEN IS UPON US. UNDER MY NEW REGIME, I MEAN, PLAN - A LITTLE SOMETHING I LIKE TO CALL THE "REVOLUTION PLAN," ALL DEPARTMENTS, BUILDINGS, PROGRAMS, TEAMS, CLUBS AND DINING FACILITIES WILL FALL UNDER THE LARGE AND SPACIOUS UMBRELLA OF MY OFFICE. CONSOLIDATING ALL […]

Misconceptions abound about the Campus Campus Revolution and its quality. Contrary to popular belief, we are never inaccurate and any quotes used are direct and exact. The administration and the students attempt to slander the name of the CCR and degrade our establishment, but it must be defended. We are an upstanding and well put-together […]