Students were surprised this past week as they arrived at the SA presidential debate when they saw that there were not three but four candidates running, one more than most people had known were running. For most, it was their first encounter with the newest, insurgent campaign sweeping across campus.

The campaign was unexpected to most, but everyone on campus already knows the candidate. Her name is Melanie Sauce.

Many students expressed doubts about Mel Sauce’s bid to head the student body, but in a political era that some analysts have taken to calling “The Year of the Unnaturally Orange,” the bold Rochesterian condiment may just have a shot.

“I’ve known Mel since my freshman year,” said Kate Nurt, a senior and one of the small but vocal group of Mel Sauce supporters at the debate. “She’s active all over campus, from the Pit to Hillside, I’ve even seen her at Eastman! And she’s really been making an effort to step up her visibility these past few weeks.”

“Not that it takes much to have a bigger on-campus presence than ‘President Vito,’” added Kris Kooc, another Sauce supporter at the debate.

Many students, however, expressed their doubts about Sauce’s campaign.

“Sure, her rhetoric may sound new and refreshing for now,” said junior Jakob Gerb, an ardent Horgan/Chiodo supporter. “But Mel doesn’t have the experience to turn words into action, and I guarantee by July all that rhetoric will get stale real fast.”

Others cited potential ethical concerns about the campaign.

“She may try to tell you she’s running ‘for the people,’ but she’s corrupt as they come,” said senior Fred Walls, a student who says he is undecided but leaning toward voting for Vermin Supreme. “I’ve heard she can be bought for as little as $6!”

But regardless of whether she wins, no one can argue that Mel Sauce’s presence has added more than a little bit of spice to this election season.



Mel Sauce for President

So, you have a degree in Biochemistry and English. You served in student government for four years, clustered in Astrophysics, and speak passable German. In other words, you’re unemployed.  Read More

Mel Sauce for President

After walking around campus, as well as other areas such as parks in Northwestern New York, spotting birds has become more commonplace. The resident bird species are singing, foraging, and preparing to nest while many migratory birds are starting to arrive. Read More

Mel Sauce for President

While looking for something to do on a Friday evening, five of us at the Campus Times made our way down to ESL Ballpark April 17 to catch a Rochester Red Wings game. Our group boasted a Mets fan, a Yankees fan, a Padres fan, a Twins fan, and one person more familiar with cricket than with baseball. Read More