Aries (March 21-April 19) – Be careful not to cut off your thumb, because then your friends will feed it to a bum. Taurus (April 20-May 20) – Today is your lucky day; everything will be going your way. Gemini (May 21-June 21) – If your sub-woofer is really bumpin’, get a fly honey and start-a-humpin’.Cancer (June 22-July 22) – Hit on a group of girls wearing blue and watch how your hottest fantasy comes true. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) – If you think you’ve got rhymes sicker than mine, come on down and write horoscopes for the Campus Times. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) – Avoid sharp edges whenever you can, such as a razor blade, a knife or the tip of your pen. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) – Don’t answer your phone, it could be a stalker. If she tries to instant message you, make sure that you block her. Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) – Think before you speak, in fact, just shut-up for the rest of the week. Try to be nice because before the week ends, you might not have anymore friends. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) – Give a dog a bone if you see one on the street, you never know, one day he may find you and poo on your feet. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) – When you wake up tomorrow morning, drink a glass of juice. It’s tasty, refreshing and good for your caboose. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) – Take candy from a stranger and you’ll be free of danger. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) – Go outside while the weather permits, because in a few weeks it’ll really be the pits. (If you actually believe this, then you believe that Jessica Simpson is too hard to love.)

The Clothesline Project gives a voice to the unheard

The Clothesline Project was started in 1990 when founder Carol Chichetto hung a clothesline with 31 shirts designed by survivors of domestic abuse, rape, and childhood sexual assault.

The NBA’s MVP candidates

Against the Cleveland Cavaliers, center Nikola Jokić posted 26 points, 18 rebounds, and 16 assists in 35 minutes. That same…

UR Womens’ Lacrosse trounces Nazareth 17-5

UR’s Womens’ Lacrosse team beat Nazareth University 17–5 on Tuesday at Fauver Stadium.