I have this fantasy where I walk into my room where my girlfriend and some chick are making out. They ask me to join, and soon we are having some real fun. It’s kinky and wild. I wake up psyched. I want to tell my girlfriend and try it out, but I think she might freak out. What should I do? – Forbidden Fantasy in Fairchild

Dear Forbidden Fantasy,

There are several issues to deal with here before you change your tango into a trio. It is common for men to fantasize about sex with more than one woman at the same time. First, consider making your fantasy a reality. Will this affect your current relationship or how you view your girlfriend? Is this a real desire or a dream best left between the nocturnal wet sheets?

Many fantasies are disappointing once lived out. If you decide you must see the girls go for the gold, proceed cautiously. Pick a time when your girlfriend is neither stressed nor ready to rip your proverbial head off. When bridging the extra lover topic, emphasize to your partner how much you value her.

You may want to suggest the trio as a fulfillment of fantasy. That is, you are adding some spice to an already great stew. Focus on your partner’s competency as a sexual goddess. This may open her mind to inviting a friend for some Friday night fun.

Never pressure a lover. If she refuses, let the idea rest for a bit. Even if your partner is decisive, she will need some time to consider your fantasy. While you have been living with this pleasant reality, for her it may be a new thought.

You should be ready for your partner to have her own fantasies. She may want to bring an extra boy for some serious man loving. Consider whether you are open to what your girlfriend might ask of you. If you aren’t willing too fulfill that desire, you may need to help live out another one of your partner’s fantasies.

Within the threesome there are some basic rules. Any happy trio is a good soccer game. Follow the rules and it’s just some good, occasionally dirty, sweaty fun. If you don’t-someone will be hurt. First, equality is key, everyone gets a turn to be a star player. Remember to focus on your girlfriend. Next, you must ensure that your choice for the third wheel is a good one. Trust is key, always know your team member’s sexual history. When selecting a third sexual partner, you should be as selective as you were when deciding to sleep with your current girlfriend.

Teamwork is also vital to win the relationship game. ou should discuss the sex before the trio event and after with your girlfriend. This is a great chance to learn about each other’s needs and a chance for some real growth. Last, safety is needed for some good ol’ friendly fun. Protection, protection, protection.

Best of luck to living out your dreams forbidden fantasy.

Got a love and relationship question that’s literally, ummm … burning? Ask the Love Goddess herself, Robyn Tanner, at ctfeats@hotmail.com.



Sex & the CT

URochester’s annual Senior Week always features a full lineup of celebrations for the graduates leading up to Commencement. The contemporary week-long fun is deeply embedded in the history of URochester culture, even though Senior Week and Commencement traditions have changed dramatically over time. Read More

Sex & the CT

After walking around campus, as well as other areas such as parks in Northwestern New York, spotting birds has become more commonplace. The resident bird species are singing, foraging, and preparing to nest while many migratory birds are starting to arrive. Read More

Sex & the CT

So, you have a degree in Biochemistry and English. You served in student government for four years, clustered in Astrophysics, and speak passable German. In other words, you’re unemployed.  Read More