Archives - CT Staff
Whacking off results with blow-up in face
I am so embarrassed! Last week, I was masturbating on my couch and was caught! I didn't think my housemates would be home - they were all working. One of them came home early and there I was. She didn't say anything, just stared at the dog, who kept attacking the towel I had used […]
Defense shuts down opponents to win tournament
A coach will always tell his or her players that defense wins games, and this was the case for the women's soccer team when they won the Flower City Tournament this past weekend. Throughout the two games of the tournament, the Yellowjackets allowed a total of three shots on goal, two of which were saves […]
Athlete walks the globe this summer
Some people sprint to get to the finish line, while others power walk to it, which was the case for sophomore Laura Richenderfer all summer long. When many students were enjoying cushy internships or high-paying physical labor, Richenderfer was busy walking toward national and even international acclaim. Her journey started here at UR, where she […]
Horoscopes
Aries (March 21-April 19) - You know that the combination of warm weather, sun and Rochester is too much for your feeble mind to handle. To help this sensory overload, try and numb your senses by going out every single day of the week. Taurus (April 20-May 20) - Feeling the pressure of classes already? […]
London attacks inspire self-reflections
There's a busy square in London where I used to eat my hummus and cucumber sandwiches. It's called Russell Square and is bizarrely idyllic in contrast to what would eventually take place a block away in Tavistock Square on July 7, 2005. An outdoor caf sits near the entrance, a stone's throw away from a […]
English flatmates invoke toilet catastrophes
Having safely returned to the United States after seven months on British soil, I thought it necessary to pay tribute to the long time I spent abroad. All the wonderful accents and the many pints of beer and of course the infamous episode of "The Toilet Paper Stalemates." So Britain, this one is for you.Once […]
Bush proves inadequate
There are few people more incompetent and unqualified to handle their jobs and responsibilities than President George W. Bush. But I suppose it is only fitting that one of those people was appointed directly to his position by Bush himself. It's hard to have a more pathetic rsum than Bush, but the head of the […]
Editorial Cartoon
A post imported by CoPress Convert.
SA Profile: Common Connection
For all you blatantly self-absorbed students, you probably have not noticed the large green and white sign that hangs right next to what was previously known as the Wilson Commons Information Center. However, for those of you who are observant, you are probably wondering what exactly the Common Connection is and how it can help […]
Target stores please all eager student shoppers
This summer I returned to my childhood home of Princeton, N.J., which I figured would have been a calming relief compared to my hectic social and academic life at the UR, I found myself in a tizzy. First, there was the whole Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah's couch escapade and yelling at women who had […]