You have chosen wisely!!! Professors from the psychology department recently decided to give their students more choices on exams.

Complaining that the answers on psychology exams are too obtuse, freshman Pete S. Sake claims, ?They give you A through E as answers, but half the time, most of the answers are, like, all the same. They need to be more clear. I think they may just be messing with us, to be honest.?

In response to complaints such as these, all psychology students will be treated to questions with answers A through Q from now on.

With so many choices, there will never be any confusion as to what the professor is looking for. Whether anyone will be able to finish these new exams remains to be seen.

Realizing there may be something to this choice phenomenon sweeping the River Campus, Parking Services has decided to give students more parking options.

Sick of hearing students complain that there isn?t enough good parking on campus, one parking official noted, ?We really want to create a better relationship between Parking Services and students.?

If you think creating more parking options for students is a good idea, see Story E, Page 10.

If you think parking is fine the way it is, see Story F, Page 11.



Story D:

President and senior Mennatallah “Mennah” Mohamed shared that this dinner was a “time to highlight how Arab culture is so interconnected.” Read More

Story D:

Through a live demonstration and tasting, Chef Dede prepared fried chicken, baked macaroni and cheese, and collard greens – dishes rooted in Black Southern history. Students leaned in as she explained the methods and care that go into each plate. Read More

Story D:

Sections of River Campus’ pedestrian tunnel system will be closed this fall as the University continues repair work on its underground utility tunnels. Read More