I’m just going to come out and say it: “Argylle” bored me. I thought that since it was directed by Matthew Vaughn, director and writer of the Kingsmen franchise and director of “Kick-Ass,” I would enjoy this movie like I did his previous films. However, just like all the Taylor Swift theorists — who thought Elly Conway was Taylor Swift —  I was disappointed.

Elly Conway (Bryce Dallas Howard) is a writer of the acclaimed spy novel series “Argylle,” which details the life of Agent Argylle and his missions. As she begins to write her next book, she finds herself dealing with writer’s block, until she gets wrapped up in a mystery dragged alongside real-life spy Aiden (Sam Rockwell) who tells her that her novels predict real-world events. Together, they try and beat the clock to find the “master key” before a dastardly spy organization, known as the Division, led by Ritter (Bryan Cranston) gets ahold of it — or them — first. 

Not even the star-studded ensemble cast could hold this story together. The film boasts all-star actors like Henry Cavill, John Cena, Samuel L. Jackson, Ariana DeBose, Catherine O’Hara, and pop star Dua Lipa… and fumbles the bag catastrophically, failing to use any of them to their full potential.

The supporting characters have little screen time; either they leave the movie entirely or end up lost in the plot. I was also astounded by how little Cavill was in it, given that he is positioned dead center on the poster (I’m not kidding, look it up). 

Aside from poor character usage, the film’s plot also falls through. The characters make terrible decisions only to further the plot; otherwise, it would have ended sooner. And just when the story started to hook me, it introduced convoluted plot twists that lost me and made me feel the film’s 2-hour and 19-minute runtime. The plot twists happened so frequently that I wasn’t able to follow the story — I genuinely had to look at the plot description on Wikipedia in the middle of the movie to understand what was going on. 

The film’s special effects were also lacking. The poorly CGI-ed cat in the trailer gives this away early, and the problem only worsens tenfold in the actual movie. The green-screened backgrounds looked particularly horrible, bringing me out of the already-lackluster plotline.

This film did have some redeeming qualities, though, one of which being Howard’s and Rockwell’s performances. Their chemistry as the leads was great, and they’re equally entertaining to watch as spies. Rockwell, in particular, had great comedic timing that worked towards what the film tried but failed to be. 

The most fun parts of the entire film were the action sequences. Vaughn never fails to create surreal fight scenes which you can’t help but be astounded by. The choreography for the fights —  my favorites being the one in the train, which was featured in the trailer, and one of the fights in the last act — was gorgeously and creatively done, keeping me somewhat interested. 

This new release is skip-worthy, unless you’re a massive fan of action comedies or looking to waste some time. Although I spy a potential franchise in the making, this film overall misses the mark. 



“Heretic” is thoughtful, but falls short in the fear aspect

I would definitely recommend it to anyone who likes a dialogue-heavy film, but not to someone who’s looking for a horror flick. 

Whatever happened to the dormitories of yesteryear?

Two images come to mind: One is of cinder block-walled rooms hidden behind brutalist edifices, and the other is of air-conditioned suites bathed in natural light.

Four students arrested in conjunction with ‘wanted’ posters

The Department of Public Safety (DPS) announced the arrests of four individuals allegedly involved in the recent distribution of ‘wanted’ posters.