1. A new poll finds that 21 percent of students at Harvard are virgins. 

Sounds like homework isn’t the only thing students are doing.

2. The UN panel has advised nations to invest in preparing for “irreversible” effects from global warming. 

After some debate as to what topic to address first, the UN agreed this one would break the ice.

3. A Michigan couple is getting married after collectively losing 380 pounds.

It looks like neither the man nor the woman wanted to invest any weight in this relationship.

4. A man is relieved after physically removing his wife’s wedding ring just after his donkey swallowed it.

He definitely pulled this one out of his ass.

5. A weather man was caught on live television urinating in some bushes. 

He did say there was a chance of precipitation.

6. NFL star Adrian Peterson has now reached a plea deal on a lesser charge in his child-abuse case.

This is good news for the Vikings because they could use someone to beat the Bears this week.

7. A rare fanged deer has been found roaming the Middle East, causing some to  call it ‘Vampire Bambi.”

As the vampire deer approaches the back of the vehicle… “That’s odd, I didn’t see it in the mirror.”

8. A truck slammed into South Glastonbury church over the weekend.

The priest came out to help but soon gave up after realizing the vehicle wasn’t convertible.

9. Heavy flooding is starting to cause damage in the south of France.

And it’s driving everyone in-Seine.

10. In Baltimore, golf is being seen as a way to help juvenile offenders.

The game gives these young kids stars to look up to. Such as Tiger Woods for marriage values, or Dustin Johnson for avoiding drug use.

Horgan is a member of
the class of 2017.



Poking fun at the news

The Gorbunova-Seluanov Lab, led by URochester’s Doris Johns Cherry Professor of Biology and Medicine Vera Gorbunova, as well as Dean’s Professor of Biology and Medicine Andrei Seluanov, studies the molecular and genetic processes behind aging in different mammals, as this class of animals provides more insight on human aging and health.  Read More

Poking fun at the news

We teach the Dust Bowl as a cautionary tale. In every American history class, we learn how farmers in the 1920s and 1930s tore up millions of acres of native grassland across the Great Plains to plant wheat, how the deep-rooted prairie grasses that held the soil and trapped moisture were replaced by shallow crops and bare fields, and, when drought came in 1930, how the exposed topsoil turned to dust. Read More

Poking fun at the news

Anderson’s research — which centers on leadership development and the systems-level changes needed to improve educational outcomes, especially in historically underserved communities — made her an especially attractive candidate. Read More