Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t endow Woody Allen with an extraordinary level of wisdom, but I think he made an unintentionally insightful comment when he kidded, ‘Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.”
When Allen cites a division between sex and humor, I don’t think he’s failing to comprehend the beauty of a Monica Lewinsky joke I think he’s pointing out that the sex act itself somehow seems so serious, so separate: that lust-and-laughter combination is reserved for the communal space of the comedy theatre, not the private room between the left and right pillowcase.
But why is that? Why is it taboo to giggle at the inopportune, overheard conversation emanating from your hallway, the unanticipated collapse of a knee or the tenderly awkward moment your teeth collide?
If we can devote entire comedy routines to the acceptance of sexual short-comings, it shouldn’t be difficult to infuse our partnered, or alone, time with a little lightheartedness. When you’ve got a friendly, flexible partner, a particularly slippery set of tiger-print bedsheets, and at least eight minutes at your disposal, a round of carnal activity can incite gut-wrenching giggles, and, for those without steady activity, all it takes is a little motivation.
While it may seem like a tough task to insert more humor into your own self-love routine, since there isn’t anyone around, your ardent naked dancing will easily do it. But that’s the unexpected genius of porn bloopers: They provide an accommodating antidote.
Take a cue from the ever-ready blonde Briana Banks. In one scene, she sprawls out graciously on a quilted bedspread, and a steely nuts-and-bolts toolman comes to her aid. As they rigorously test his equipment, a sudden shift collapses half the bed, and she bursts out laughing. He bows his forehead into her collarbone as they uproariously explode into giggles, and the scene lingers a minute before changing back into its original plot line.
As any Internet porn forager knows, the DVD outtakes can show that even licensed professionals sometimes trip up in their efforts to be carnally convincing assuring you that, when you do encounter your next partner, you’ll provide plenty of live entertainment yourself.
For those without regular play partners and who are more into the weekend hookup scene, infusing your tentative first exploits might prove more difficult, as laughter can sometimes be mistaken for an insult to one’s prowess.
Here, it might not be in your best interest just yet to bust out those hip gyrations if you’re actually trying to skillfully sway the lady. Instead, why don’t you try some eighth-grade-style tickling once you get your mouth on hers? Or you can always make comedic overexaggerated ‘O” faces if you two are more of hookup buddies she’s surely already acclimated to your particular brand of humor.
If you already have a partner and are trying to insert a little more laughter-fueled lovin’ into your libidinous behaviors, surprise her with an uncannily unrehearsed lap dance. You don’t have to own one of those Carmen Electra videos to get your love life kicked into high gear.
Totally tactless dancing should get you both in the mood just as quickly, and that way you don’t have to don a feather boa and can take your pole-dancing skills at their mirthful face value Carmen Electra be damned. This technique works better for more established couples, as it shows the key to sticking together is really just as time-old as that antiquated adage: When it comes to between-the-sheets bootyshaking, a couple that plays together, stays together.
Titus is a member of the class of 2011.