You may or may not have heard that the administration is presently sequestered away, debating on whether or not to implement unto the fraternal world a deferred rush system. They argue that, amongst other considerations, having freshman rush in the fall doesn’t provide ample time for the youngsters to truly acclimate themselves to university life before they engage in a lifelong contract to the fraternity of their choosing.

Thus, under the new deferred rush rules, current freshmen would be eligible to rush in fall of 2017. Personally, I couldn’t be happier.

When I arrived on campus in the fall of freshman year, pledging a fraternity seemed an obvious choice. In the same vein as countless fraternity brothers and newspaper editors before, I was a hardened ass kicker – an ass kicker who couldn’t grow facial hair, granted, but one out to brawl, booze, and bang nonetheless.

Fraternities were, to me, synonymous with drunken debauchery, and such was an environment in which I knew I would thrive. I eagerly anticipated four years of assorted probations for a myriad of fights, vandalisms and offensive antics.

However, despite a depressing lack of said antics to accompany our probations, the administration has nonetheless recognized the frightening potential for mischief that lurks within each brotherhood. Appropriately then, in their review of the Greek system, the administration has questioned whether or not fraternity members actually bring anything to the sprawling table of diversity that is our university. The question is certainly valid, and I fear that we fraternities will be unable to sufficiently defend ourselves.

After all, I have little more to show for three years of fraternity-based college than a couple of degrees and an editing job. Similarly, one of my ill-fated Sigma Chi pledge brothers toiled occasionally and usually drunkenly during his college career, eventually to have it shamefully collapse into his appointment as Speaker of the Students’ Association Senate.

And we, it seems, were the fortunate ones. I can speak with certainty only regarding my own house, but it alone provides a sufficient cross section of the woebegone fraternity system, rife with poor bastards whose college tenures culminated in condemnation to such institutions as Take 5 and 3-2. Clearly, the fraternity system does offer something to the university, and that something is infectious sloth.

But what do I care? I’m a senior, and the end of my fraternal obligations can’t come soon enough. From fraternity life I expected 50 hooligans, liars, and backstabbers – a house full of cheaters, alcoholics and scumbags. I wanted an environment that fostered contempt, infidelity and treachery. But I didn’t get it. Instead, the best fraternity life could offer me was 50 proofreaders, teammates and “Player 2″s – a house full of road trippers, confidants, and achievers. The environment I lived in encouraged nothing but confidence, responsibility, and, dare I say it, brotherhood.

Talk about disappointment.

Janowitz can be reached at

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