Fieri: Hey everyone, I’m Guy Fieri and we’re rolling out looking for America’s greatest diners, drive-ins and dives. Today we’re in one of America’s most beautiful cities—Rochester, New York! It is home to the groovin’ University of Rochester, freezing weather, one of the highest murder rates in the country, and of course, delicious food! Radical! That’s all here right now on triple D!

Theme song and sequence plays.

Fieri: We’re visiting Douglass Dining Center at the University of Rochester. When I found out that this school was ranked #6 on a list of best campus dining facilities, I knew I had to check out what all the hype was about!

Camera pans to the academic quad in the dead of winter. The trees are completely bare and a lone student nearly unrecognizable under a huge parka hurries late to class. 

Fieri: Man. This place is rockin’!

Parks bright red convertible (with top down, even in winter) and camera follows as Fieri walks into Douglas Dining Center. 

Fieri: [Clapping hands] All right, let’s do this! We’re at the hub of campus life, Douglass Dining Center! You can really tell that the students LOVE it here.

Camera shifts to show two students at a table nervously looking at each other as over-enthusiastic Fieri approaches.

Fieri: Okay guys, what makes this place so special?

Student 1: My favorite part of Douglass is when you wait in line for 30 minutes for the cashier to swipe your ID. There’s honestly nothing like spending time standing in the cold with your classmates.

Student 2: Yeah, we really love Douglass. Where else can you order chicken and receive a gray blob of meat on your plate? No place on campus can compare. It’s really great.

Fieri: Awesome! Let’s go see what’s going on in the kitchen.

Camera follows Fieri through dining hall to kitchen.

Fieri: I’m here with my man Erik, head chef of this funky establishment. All right, brother; what are we making?

Erik rolls up sleeves as Fieri continues to over-gesticulate.

Erik: Well, today, we are making what I like to call “pasta surprise.” First, we heat up some frozen pasta and then we scramble up some random ingredients and throw them in a saucepan together.

Fieri: Pasta and sauce, two of my favorite things! Sounds super cool, my dude. Looks like you got quite the assortment of ingredients there.

Erik starts adding ingredients into a giant vat.

Erik: So basically we’re gonna add some oil, oregano, tomato paste, this herb that I don’t know the name of but looks really cool and some garlic.

As ingredients are being added, Fieri sticks his head into barrel of sauce .

Fieri: MMMMM…OREGANO. Fieri likey.

Erik: [Chuckling at Fieri’s antics] And then we’re gonna mix the sauce and pasta together and throw it in the oven for forty-five minutes because why the heck not?

Fieri: We’re gonna check out this saucy surprise right after the break!

Commercial break.

Fieri: We’re back on Triple D! Erik is just taking the pasta surprise right out of the oven, and I got to say this thing looks righteous, my man.

Giant tray of bubbling pasta is set in front of Fieri.

Fieri: All right, let’s try this bad boy.

Close up of Guy shoving food into mouth. Eyes roll back in apparent pleasure, as he takes minute to compose himself.

Fieri: This is out of this freakin’ world!

Camera pans to student eating same thing.

Student 3: Oh yeah, this is awesome, I can’t even tell what ingredients are in here, and that’s honestly a good thing.

Student 4: I really love how congealed this dish is. Normally you don’t want your pasta to be crispy on the outside and “melt-in-your-mouth” on the inside, but it totally works in this case.

Fieri: A true crowd-pleaser! Well Erik, I don’t know how you do it, but this whole place is rockin’ and rollin’. Great vibes man. You really crushed it.

Fieri walks out of Douglass into snowstorm outside.

Fieri: So, that’s it for this joint, but coming up after the commercial break we’re heading to Mex, a local dive where I’m told the entire Greek community likes to come get drunk off cheap margaritas, take selfies and feel superior. See you there, man; sounds like a real party!

Barkan is a member of
the class of 2017.

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