When did it become the girl’s responsibility to make the first move? I remember the good old days when guys were the ones who made the first phone call and rudely grabbed at inappropriate places. It never used to be the girl’s job to swoop in and initiate the first kiss – the girl as provocateur is unnatural.
It’s true that girls complain about aggressive guys and make repeated attempts to push their hands away; however, it brings them pleasure to be the one to reject. In fact, it’s their god-given duty.
I first became aware of guys’ new movement to let girls do all the work my freshman year. I had met a cute guy on the frat quad and was eager to ignite a hot and heavy romance, at least for the night.
I was ecstatic as we walked up to my dorm-room. I assumed he would ask to come in, followed by my resistance and then eventual compliance – standard first-night protocol. But my world came to an end when he dropped me off at my room, pecked my cheek and told me he had a wonderful time and that I must call him. I was then forced to shove him into my room and tiresomely play the role of aggressor.
This type of male opposition was not an isolated case but a ravenous disease. Last summer, my best friend’s new boyfriend exhibited many of the symptoms. He was the worst when it came time for what used to be the obligatory drop-off make-out session. Every time he drove her home, she expected him to lean in and initiate some sort of sexual activity. However, he would merely touch his lips to hers and say, “See ya tomorrow.” She came home confused and angry. It was not until she pried open his lips and told him he had to overcome his malady that he fully kissed her.
I experienced even more confusion a few months ago. I was in the midst of passion with a love-interest when I realized he was silent. Annoyed that he wasn’t vocalizing his great attraction for me, I asked what turned him on. His reply was, “Your personality, the way you look and your intelligence.” My jaw dropped. Wasn’t he supposed to respond with an offensive and vulgar answer that would result in a slap or the slamming of a car door? What caused this role reversal? Is it guys playing hard to get, or did girls dig themselves into a hole by advocating for equal rights? Sure, we want equal opportunities in the workplace, but we still want to be thrown against a wall so a guy can have his way with us.
Permutt can be reached at spermutt@campustimes.org.
