My girlfriend is pissed at me because she says I watch too much porn. I didn’t think you could watch too much porn, but she says it offends her and is as bad as if I was with another chick. Am I wrong or is she crazy?
~Man-enough in Morgan
Dear Man-enough,
It sounds like there is a serious lack of communication between you and your girlfriend concerning pornographic material. You might want to ask her exactly what about watching porn bothers her. This will give you some insight into how to help her feel better without feeling like you have to sneak around.
Perhaps she just feels left out and would like to join for movie night!
Porn can be a serious moral dilemma for some couples and as such, she may not concede to your viewing pleasures, even with a front row invite. She is certainly not crazy, and simplifying the problem to her lack of sanity will only serve to fuel the fire.
Whenever you attack her with the intent of asserting your position, you ultimately polarize her views and make her hatred of Jenna Jameson even stronger.
As difficult as it may be to understand how she could see your movie collection as cheating, trying to understand her disgust with your past time humors may help both of you. Your “chick” may see viewing intimate moments as offensive. It may be worse than when you forget to flush in the morning.
Yes indeed, porn can be foul. Some preliminary aides to relax her views on “Debbie Does Dallas” may be to take them off the top of the entertainment center and tuck them away in a drawer.
You should never lie to her about whether you still watch it, but if she feels she is sinning just by walking into your room, then it may help to eliminate unwanted visuals. On another note, it is possible to watch too much porn. Porn, like any aspect of your life, can become an addiction. If your naughty viewings begin to interfere with your class attendance, communication with your partner or nutrition, then it may be time to take a break. Even DVD players need naps.
It’s pretty common for girls to be offended by porn, so your belle is not at all abnormal or “crazy.” Oprah, the relationship guru, offered some advice to the porn conflict. Tell her that the porn is simply your vibrator. Of course, depending on the nature of your conflict on porn, it may help or worsen the argument.
At the very least, it can put your whack-watching habits in check. Hope that clarifies things for you, Man-enough. Got the visual?
Love is about compromising. If your match is the yin to your yang, I suggest cutting down on the viewing. Less porn does your relationship good.
Got a question about relationships, love or sex? E-mail Robyn Tanner for real answers to your real questions at ctfeats@hotmail.com.
