Hey. I am a straight man, but I don’t mind receiving fellatio from presumably gay men. Some of my friends think that makes me gay or somewhat bisexual. I disagree. What do you think?~Straight Shooter
Dear Straight Shooter,Gay and straight are not exactly as clear-cut as nibble or suck. First, work on looking at the context of your fun-filled fellatio times. While the behavior is homosexual – in that you are having sexual contact with a male – the greater context of the experience may not be homosexual for you. Three basic categories by which individuals can define themselves as homosexual are behavior, self-identification and contact. While your contact may be gay, you may not feel this identity. Sexuality is all about what you feel – literally as well as figuratively.Next, Shooter, ignore the absolutes. Think of sexuality as a wheel where one extreme is heterosexual while the other is homosexual. Most of the population is somewhere between the extremes. Think of riding the wheel as another event at the fair, right next to your academic bumper cars. So whether you’re a girl who likes the occasional tit exposure from Ms. Jackson or, in Shooter’s situation, the inability to define your sexuality is normal. Further consider the bi-boat, where you may be attracted to both males and females. There aren’t clear answers, but take comfort that they don’t exist for many people.Try to focus on the present attraction, which may also change. As a college student, you are experiencing much growth. While you may go for the boys today and the girls tomorrow – you still may be in a transitional period. Lastly, don’t be afraid to be gay or bisexual – they aren’t diseases. What’s important is finding satisfaction going for whoever gets you going, aside from the illegals of life.Hope you weren’t looking for an easy lover’s litmus test, Shooter. Even if you favor the penis, remember you can still hit your target.Got a love and relationship question that’s literally, ummm… burning? Ask the Love Goddess herself, Robyn Tanner, at ctfeats@hotmail.com.
