My roommate and her boyfriend are always having sex in our room. It’s gotten to the point where I am afraid to go home to my own personal space for fear of walking in on something. This really needs to stop. ? I smell sex and candy in Sue. B.

Most of us have experienced it ? the blue dot on the dry-erase board, the sweaty partner answering the door half-naked, and the fresh scent of jizz.

Being sexiled is a common phenomenon in college, especially if you are a freshman. You are going to have to learn to deal with it to an extent, at least until you get a single or your roommate becomes asexual.

Students are young and horny, and there are a limited amount of places to get it on. People do it in the stacks, the shower, everywhere. . .probably on that park bench you are sitting on right now.

You do, however, have rights as a resident of your room. Voice them. That’s of course the place where your comfy bed, Dreamcast and packs of ramen live.

You should not have to witness your roommate in mid-coitus and the smell of sex should not be on your bed unless you left it there.

The first plan of action should be to discuss the situation with your roommate. She should respect your feelings and wishes, and help think of solutions. Also, both of you should organize a warning system so that there are no unexpected sexual surprises.

Towels, scrunchies, and rubber bands around the doorknob are a few favorites. The blue dot on the dry erase board is also an infamous college tradition.

It’s all about compromising, though. Do some bargaining. Just because you aren’t getting any now, doesn’t mean you won’t want to sexually occupy your room in the future. Let your roommate know when you will be gone, that way you will have dibs on it for a future date. Also, ask that your partner and her boyfriend think about using the boyfriend’s room some of the time as well.

If your roommate rejects these normal requests and you just can’t take it anymore, contact residential life and request a room-change. ? Joan

If you have any love and relationship questions that are literally, ummm ? burning, they can be sent to the love goddess herself, Joan Knihnicki. She can be reached at

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