How does one regain that lovin’ feeling?

? Could-be-wilder in Wilder

Rather than begging your doctor for Viagra or ordering a dozen bottles of Passion ZX, try some of these suggestions first.

The most important aspect of lovemaking is communication. People who share their desires and dislikes with each other are more satisfied with their sexual relationships. Asserting and performing the right actions in bed can send your libido through the roof.

When conveying what makes you aroused, try to be positive. Hype up your partner’s moves that send you begging for more. Seductively whispering something like, “Oh, I love it when you caress my thigh,” is better than saying, “Get your damn hands off my butt!” Sometimes verbal communication alone is enough to warrant a cigarette afterwards.

Touching can be very erotic, too. In between classes, set aside some time with your partner in a warm, cozy environment. Unplug the phone and put on some Jill Smith. Disrobe each other slowly and sensually, spending time on each button and zipper. The anticipation heightens arousal that will have you gasping in ecstasy as your partner finally has his or her way with you.

Take turns touching each other, paying special attention to textures, temperatures, and noises of excitement. Touching provides not only satisfaction for the person on the receiving end, but also for the person using the fingers.

Also, try masturbating with your partner. By pleasuring yourself in front of your honey, you are teaching him or her what turns you on. Next time you are playing, he or she will not be fumbling around and guessing what makes you squeal with delight.

When it comes to masturbation, however, men probably attain more enjoyment from this than women do.

This is presumably due to the fact that women do not openly admit to masturbation. This self-stimulation spectacle can be seen as a forbidden event that he should not be seeing. This in turn should make him even more aroused.

? Joan

Love and relationship questions can be sent to the love goddess herself, Joan Knihnicki, at

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