Coming up with 12 horoscopes every week can get pretty boring. I mean, who really feels like writing about other people all the time? For this edition, I decided it would be more fun to write about myself. I happen to be a Leo, so everyone else whose sign is the lion got lucky this week, and everyone else is just screwed. It?s not like you matter anyway.

Leo (July 23?Aug. 22) ? You are the smartest, best-looking person to ever grace the face of this planet. Everyone secretly worships you, even if it seems like they think you are a pretentious snob. They are totally jealous, and just can?t stand how wonderful you are. Sigh. It?s not easy being perfect.

Everyone else ? Didn?t you pay attention to the comment at the beginning? You don?t matter as much as Leos do, because Leos rule the world.



Horoscopes

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