I know that you know that I know that you know about the SA IMPACT program, which gives students the opportunity to make a petition and attempt to implement an idea into student life. At first, I was slightly skeptical of the idea (I don’t like change unless it’s written by David Bowie), but after reading through the petitions something caught my eye. There’s petition that has far too little support considering its idea. Really, I’m not huge on what it is supporting, but at the end of the day, I think it really comes down to what the petition represents.

Some would say—and by some I mean at least myself— that the petition and its writer are revolutionary. It changes the game. I caught up with the writer who left an anonymous comment, “I’m a Blimpie Cashier who occasionally gets tired of my usual sandwich. To spice things up, I propose having Totino’s Pizza Rolls EVERYWHERE on campus.”

I had one question, “Why Totino’s Pizza Rolls when Bagel Bites are far superior?” This led to a discussion about future possible options for Greece’s financial crisis, but that’s beside the point. In response, I’ve thought of a few future possible petitions that may have the potential to gain support.

My first thought is related to the whole sleeping pod addition to Gleason. Sleeping pods are nice and all, but they always seem to be taken when I’m trying to nap. Rather than limiting ourselves to a few sleeping pods, what if we transform a hidden room in Rush Rhees that is hard to find into a sleeping room. We could fill it with mattresses and leave it open for most hours of the day. We will call it a Sleep-Deprived Mentally Under Stress Home Room; or if you prefer SMUSH Room.

A second thought consists of employing individuals to solve problems on whiteboards. After overhearing the story of a student leaving a problem on a whiteboard and having it solved, I had eagerly attempted it myself. It didn’t work.

I assumed those who answered white board problems when students weren’t there were very similar to the elves that my mom talked about who occasionally cleaned my room and made my bed. With this in mind, these problem-solving students are a lot harder to find! Therefore, I propose that there be employees who walk around and write answers on whiteboards. This will also probably maybe increase prospective student interest due to the possibility of seeing a Meridian legend actually take place before their eyes!

My final thought for a petition is to change our mascot back to the Dandelions from the Yellowjackets. I always had the impression that the goal of mascots are to be intimidating…can you imagine what would happen to our ecosystem had dandelions just disappeared? Now that’s intimidating. Also how about those allergies? What’s more intimidating, something like the RIT Tigers, an animal most people don’t see in the wild and definitely don’t see in Rochester unless at the zoo, or pollinating dandelions affecting a ton of members of the population. That’s what I thought.

At the end of the day I am very excited to see the future propositions of the SA Impact program and really hope that Totino’s Pizza Rolls become more accessible on campus. Personally, I don’t think this is what we want, but I think it’s what we need.

Kuhrt is a member of
the class of 2017.



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