When it comes to Halloween, you really only have two options. The first is to dress up in an awesome costume, go out with your friends to a Halloween party and wake up in a shower wearing someone else’s awesome costume.
The second option, for those of you who don’t have friends and costumes, is to rent a scary movie and sit around in the dark, pretending to be scared.
The problem with this option is that it’s really hard to pick a movie when you don’t have any friends to tell you what’s good. Well, that’s why they say that the Campus Times is always your friend. We’ve included relevant drinking games so that you know when to take slugs of that bourbon, you lonely soul. Here we go:
Synopsis: A writer ? Jack Nicholson ? and his family play housesitter in an isolated hotel for the winter. He flips out and puts an ax through a door. “Here’s Johnny!”
Why it’s scary: Those little twins will definitely freak you out. And the little boy is creepy too.
Relevant drinking game: Every time Jack Nicholson spells “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” wrong. Hint ? drink red rum.
A Nightmare on Elm Street
Synopsis: A killer stalks kids in their dreams, looking really scary with a glove made of knives on his hand. Eventually, one dies in her sleep and the others realize that in order to stay alive, they have to stay awake.
Why it’s scary: This is the quintessential horror film. It uses gore, but in a way that’s actually frightening instead of just being gross.
Relevant drinking game: Every time this movie reminds you of Scream, another Wes Craven movie.
The Silence of the Lambs
Synopsis: The F.B.I. has to rely on a captive serial killer to get inside the mind of one that’s on the loose. In the meantime, people wear other people’s skin.
Why it’s scary: Did we mention the skin?
Relevant drinking game: Every time someone in the room does a bad Anthony Hopkins impression.
Synopsis: The year is 2047 and it’s time for a rescue voyage to determine what became of Event Horizon, a starship that went missing seven years ago. The rescue crew soon realizes that there’s something unspeakably horrible on board Event Horizon.
Why it’s scary: This is one of the few movies out there that will actually terrify you.
Relevant drinking game: When you get so scared you need it.
Rocky Horror Picture Show
Synopsis: Brad and Janet somehow find themselves in a castle in transsexual Transylvania. Tim Curry has sex with both of them. Everyone ends up in a pool.
Why it’s scary: The moment when Meatloaf bursts in on his motorcycle is pretty terrifying.
Relevant drinking game: How about every time you feel a twinge of attraction for Tim Curry.
Synopsis: A scientist ? Gene Wilder ? tries to build a monster out of dead humans. Hilarity ensues. Meanwhile, Madeline Kahn is awesome.
Why it’s scary: It has Gene Wilder. You won’t be able to keep from thinking of that part in “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory” where he’s singing that creepy song on the boat.
Relevant drinking game: Every time Frankenstein corrects someone on the pronunciation of his name. Or every time the horse whinnies.
Army of Darkness
Synopsis: Bruce Campbell is sent back in time and forced to do battle with an army of the undead, armed only with a metal arm, a twelve-gauge shotgun and a chin that’s way too long for his face.
Why it’s scary: Did we mention the chin?
Relevant drinking game: Every time the special effects fail to impress.
Synopsis: A boy gets a doll as a present. Little does he know, it contains the soul of a serial killer who was murdered in a police shoot-out. Soon, there are lots of murders, and no one believes that it’s the doll’s fault.
Why it’s scary: Look at the giant picture at the top of this page and then you tell me.
Relevant drinking game: Every time you hear that scary voice.