UR Joking

Seligman breaks ground on University of Rochester, Minnesota

"Today, we bring the spirit of Meliora to the Med City!" the parka-clad president began as he went to dig the foundation of Barnes & Noble Hall.

New study finds majority of Eastman students are three chandeliers piled inside a trench coat

Professors are admitting that, in hindsight, the study’s findings should have been obvious from the start.

Yellowjackets blow out Patriots in Super Bowl surprise

UR Football’s 76–3 victory over the New England Patriots at Super Bowl LIII last Sunday left everyone reeling from the improbable result.

Jaeger uses Fortnite skin to relate to students

Despite purchasing the "Jaeger Primal Hunter" outfit, the professor has yet to rank in the top 75 of a 100-person game.

Choose your own blizzard/nor’easter/geostorm

Use a SAD Lamp? Attend a wedding? Wear an obscenely expensive coat? Devour a classmate? In this Choose Your Own Adventure Game, it's all up to you!

Student unaware exam mistakes are changing laws of the universe

The first-year’s eldritch ignorance first came to attention when a faulty use of the buoyancy equation sunk every vessel in the South China Sea.

University shutdown continues

Debate over funding for the proposed campus border wall prolongs the ongoing University shutdown.

Fresh alumni unable to identify any building on campus amid UR construction

The alumni strolled around campus, reminiscing about the way campus used to be. "Seems like I can't find a single building that was here when I was a student," one said. They had graduated just one week ago.

Douglass doors demand deliverance

“THIS DOOR MUST REMAIN CLOSED AT ALL TIMES,” the sign read. But did anyone ever ask the door what it thought about that?

5K Challenge winner announced

The winning proposal in the annual 5K Challenge triumphed over ideas such as massage chairs and ski pants, despite having been submitted in crayon on the back of a pizza box.