I now have been the Sports Editor at the Campus Times for nearly a semester. Normally my duties include watching sports, talking to people who play sports, and writing about sports. Unfortunately, there are currently no sports being played to write about, so I’ve had to find other ways to fill my time.

Cockroach racing
If you had Hotwheels when you were a kid, you’ll love this! Simply place two to four cockroaches on a track and put food at the other end. If you want to get fancy you can broadcast this online and take bets — people are probably bored enough to join in.

Drinking in front of your parents
Now that you’re in college, your parents let you drink at the house. But how much can you drink before they question it? A beer is certainly fine, but what if you take a shot? Can you use a beer bong? What about slap cup? Molly water? How far will your daring spirit take you?

Beyblades
Remember these? Bring back your childhood by pitting these spinning finger traps against each other. Be prepared to get your fingers cut a little by accident because you taped razor blades to them. Keep away from family pets. 

Competitive disease spreading
Did you catch coronavirus? How many people can you spread it to? Winner gets to call themselves Coronavirus Mary!

Working out
While you can’t go to the gym, there’s a lot to be said for working out in your garage. Going for a run is a good way to convince people that you’re a bank robber (Remember to cover your face with a mask and wear a suspicious coat!)

Shootin’
Since gun stores are considered essential, now is the perfect time to buy yourself a gun. Then, simply go out into the middle of nowhere and start shooting random shit. You should probably make sure there’s no one else there, but y’know, accidents happen.



Meridians seen wandering deserted River Campus may be ghosts

Corroborating reports from Public Safety, Facilities, and the student-led GhostbustURs have confirmed the presence of wandering spectral Meridians.

Fenno remembered as scholar, teacher, and colleague

Fenno, who was vital to the development of UR’s political science department as one of the field’s best in the nation, died at the age of 93 on April 21, from what was deemed a likely case of COVID-19.

URMC studies COVID-19 vaccines, social distancing

Though testing will take place with multiple visits over a period of two years, it’s possible that the resulting vaccine will be ready for emergency use before then, with plans in place for millions of doses to be available by the end of the year, and production being upped to hundreds of millions in 2021.