With the beginning of the new semester comes a time cherished by many: syllabus week. During this joyous time, students “attend class” but really do nothing more than zone out while professors read the (soon to be broken) academic honesty policy and explain complex, difficult assignments exactly once.

But some students have come face-to-face with a terrifying new development: actual assignments. Some students had a quiz on the first Friday of the semester. Others already have labs due. Still others have hundreds of pages of reading due by next week. All report experiencing the falling-in-a-dream sensation that comes from realizing at least some portion of the weekend will have to be spent productively. 

One student, first-year Nathan Buschlovsky, described how homework ruined his weekend plans. 

“My roommate moved out at the end of the semester, so now I have a single,” said Buschlovsky. “I took the doors off of his old wardrobe and laid them down on his old bed to make a beer pong table, but all I’ve used it for is assigned reading.”

The heavy loads that some students are facing this early in the semester often come from the choices of their professors. This is especially common in engineering and natural science classes. These thick, heavy loads can feel like a punch in the face for those who come back from a relaxing break.

Junior economics major Bradley Glorp was one student blindsided by a major assignment. 

“I have [Dr. Michael] Rizzo for one class,” said Glorp, “and he was like, ‘Yeah I’m not gonna give you too much work, just write three pages on your favorite beer.’ But then he also said that if we had shitty taste in beer he wouldn’t give us any credit and that really scared me.” 

When approached by the CT for comment, Dr. Rizzo confirmed that Glorp has a particular affection for Coors and thus will need to “really step it up for the rest of the semester.”

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