Beginning her stand-up career in the early ’90s, shock comic Lisa Lampanelli has performed on everything from ‘The Howard Stern Show” to roasts of Pamela Anderson, Denis Leary and William Shatner. She has released DVDs including 2005’s ‘Take it Like a Man” and 2007’s ‘Dirty Girl… No Protection.” In 2008, she was nominated for a Grammy for her ‘Dirty Girl” comedy album. She performed in Rochester’s Auditorium Theatre last Saturday and shared some of her experiences and hobbies, as well as where she gets her super-cute dresses from.
You are known as the ‘lovable queen of mean.” Do you think you are deserving of that title?
Yes, I am. You stick the lover in there. No one gets mad at me when I call them a cunt. If I were not lovable, I wouldn’t be standing here today. I’m lovable and mean, and I f*ck the blacks.
How was your show in Rochester on Saturday?
It was really good. There were really high ticket sales, and it was fantastic after my big protest in Rochester last year. The crowd was very well-behaved because, when you come to a show in a theater, you have to have respect because you bought pretty expensive tickets. More than before, people now really know me and get my insulting jokes.
Where do you get your bright, colorful dresses from?
Aren’t they cute? I get them made by a designer in Boston called Cibeline. She makes them because I wanted an innocent Connecticut housewife look. They stuck because they are in conjunction with the dichotomy of my outrageous act. I’m the coolest chick I know.
How did you get your start in comedy?
I hit 40, and I was a journalist. I went to undergrad at Syracuse, then a graduate program at Harvard for publishing. I then went to a grad program at Columbia for teaching, but I hated teaching kids so I left that. I started working for Rolling Stone. I got bored after interviewing every band I wanted to interview. I decided to try comedy and make fun of people. I was 40, and I already had a personality. And I ended up being the enormous celebrity I am today.
So you seem to have your share of experiences with the Ivy Leagues.
I hate the Ivy Leagues. You know how hard it is to go up on stage and make fun of people for an hour. These people have to get off their asses and get a job. I am like the luckiest person in the world.
Who’s the most annoying celebrity you’ve met?
Well, I haven’t really met any celebrities. No one wants to hang out with me. I’m a nobody. But I think probably Courtney Love. She’s so wacked out that she kissed me on the lips when I last saw her, and that was horrifying because I was high for five-straight days. Who smells all the time like a crack whore and cheap hooker?
What’s your favorite type of music?
I’d have to say rap. I feel that is best for ass-shaking and f*cking. In the privacy of my room, I am obsessed to the soundtrack of ‘Rent” and ‘Hairspray.” I’m definitely a black, gay man at heart.
You’ve performed on Howard Stern’s show. What’s he like in real life?
He’s the best person I’ve ever met in the world. He’s such a gentleman, and he’s so good to me. I listened to him and learned to do comedy. No subject is off limits. You take chances. He was my hero. It’s so great when your hero really likes you and you can do whatever you want. He’s top-two on my list of guys I want to marry.
Who’s the top person?
LL Cool J.
What’s your favorite city to perform in?
Um, obviously not Rochester. I froze my ass off here. My favorite city is probably New York City because you have every dirty nationality. It’s like being Dorothy in ‘The Wizard of Oz.”
What do you do during your free time?
I am currently watching a marathon of ‘The Real Housewives of Atlanta” and I’m also taking dance lessons from a Rockette for my first number on my new HBO special. I also have a spa in Tucson so I can get spiritually in touch with myself and, if that doesn’t happen, at least there are some nice sticks to look at.
Any last thoughts?
I am living proof that anything can happen. Me and a black president at the same time who would have thunk it.
Kraus is a member of the class of 2009.
Venkateswaran is a member of the class of 2011.